Chasing Love

I moved from Arambol to Palolem ten days ago for a few reasons: All my travel buddies left, I arranged a meeting with my future travel buddy Linda, and I just wanted to explore yet another beautiful beach in the south. Taking the public bus took me five stops and over four hours to get to 100km-far-away Palolem, but it paid off. Instead of 1.600 rupees (28EUR/35USD/25GBP) a taxi would charge for a 3-4 hours ride, I only paid 92 rupees (1.5EUR/2USD/1.2GBP). And with the money I splurge on food and activities, I need to budget somewhere. So what can I say about Palolem? It is even more beautiful than Arambol, has better food, a very nice beach and a more spectacular landscape. On the other hand there are lots of package tourists with their kids, couples holding hands all over the place and in general, the vibe is just different. Nevertheless, I was about to leave Goa anyway, so on Sunday night, Linda and I took the 18 hour sleeper train from Goa to Cochin.

Although we booked the lowest/cheapest/only available class to travel with, I enjoyed it a lot. The local people you meet, the crappy breakfast you get and the interesting conversations you have with the people around you are just amazing. Not to mention that the side doors are open at all times, so it has been one hell of a ride sticking half of my body out of the train while it was going some 100km/h. Next to us there was a family from Kerala who taught us some Hindi and Malayalam, offered us food and even bought Linda an Indian book! I immediately knew that Kerala (state of India in the Southwest – Where am I?) is very different then the rest of India, and believe me guys, it really is a very very special place.

Kerala is God’s Own Country as the locals call it, and perhaps they are right. Being the richest state of India (together with Goa), Kerala has the highest literacy rate of any developing country in the world! Highest suicide rates too. This place is the perfect example to see how a developing country is about to become a “first world” country in a few years time. Yes, there is the occasional fuck-up here and there, but on the other hand you see well educated, wealthy and happy people all over the place. Kerala in my opinion could easily be its own country. The history, culture, language and, well, everything is very different than the rest of India. Talking to other tourist and long-term stayers from Cochin would also agree that Kerala is its own land within India. This is just a very magical place.

Right now I am in Fort Cochin, an old colonial area in Cochin and it’s amazing here. It’s an old city where Dutch/Chinese/Arab/Portuguese/Phoenicians travelers began trading here over 600 years ago, so you can imagine how much cultural diversity this place has. There is a very strong art scene and LOVELY cafes. And please, I am emphasizing on the “LOVELY cafes” part. It almost feels like being back home with an espresso in my left hand and a Gauloise cigarette in my mouth, pretending to read the newspapers. While all this is really nice and all, the people of Kerala is what amazes me the most. I have never been to a place on earth where people are as friendly as they are here. You smile to a stranger in the Belgium? You probably get a smack on your face. You start a random conversation with a person walking next to you in England? Someone wants to nick your iPhone. You ask for directions in China? Good luck… Even the people who try to somewhat rip you off are quite open and friendly about it. They tell you anything from “Hey my friend, I give you a ride for 20 rupees and I show you my shop. You like, I get commission, you don’t like, no problem”, to “Want to buy some Marijuana? No? Ok, have a wonderful day”, all with a BIG smile on their faces and a positive aura. Two nights ago I sat down to enjoy the sunset by myself on the edge of the coast, when all of a sudden this random 20-something year old guy sat down next to me and asked me if we can be friends. Had a very interesting conversation on India, got some great suggestions on things I could do in Cochin, and after 20 minutes we both went our own ways. It’s just a very friendly atmosphere here and I’m sure that lots of other parts in the world could learn from the people of Kerala.

So what have I been up to? Yoga sessions in Goa, crappy Bollywood movies with a white people token ration of 20% and traditional Kerelan dance performances. So yes, I am experiencing the real India now. Kerala also has beautiful backwaters, so I took a seven hour backwater ride yesterday. While I felt like being in some sort of spectacular-looking, prehistorical version of  our lovely planet earth, after three hours you have seen it all. A few stops here and there to learn about how spice farms work and how they make ropes out of coconut shells, but seven hours was just too much. The other day I just cruised around Cochin and sucked in the stunning architecture of this place. I just can’t get enough of this place, but it’s time to move on. Before I finish off writing this post and continue my journey, I would like to share a little story about my ex travel buddy Linda…

Linda is a 20-something (yes Linda, you are not 30 yet!) hairdresser/psychology student from Leeds, England. I met her about two weeks ago in Arambol when she arrived on her first day in India. Followed by her new friends, she sat down next to me and we started talking. Immediately I knew she was a very interesting girl and a fun/uncomplicated person to travel with. And I mean that in a friendly, not sexual way. Soon we pinky promised each other to meet in south Goa and travel to Kerala from there in a few days time. A few messages here and there, I moved down to Palolem to enjoy my last few days in Goa. Spent a few days in Palolem and eventually left to Kerala by train. Once we arrived in Cochin, our rickshaw driver drove us to a lovely home-stay. A home-stay is like a guesthouse, but with more family integration, a communal kitchen and chill out area. On our second day we explored Fort Cochin and Erkanakulum, the main part of the city. While it was all nice, I knew something was upsetting Linda. I tried to cheer her up and make her feel better, but it didn’t get any better. That night I had dinner all by myself, where I met my current travel buddy Jonas from German. A well traveled and chilled out guy, who is pretty much on the same level as I am, but more on Jonas at some other time. While I was limiting myself to Linda and my itinerary, I suggested that we should travel together in the coming days in case Linda would go her own way. Later that night, Linda woke me up at 2AM…

“Stefano, I am leaving now”, she said. Confused and still half asleep I asked what the hell was going on. She told me that she has been crying all day long because she misses someone very special in Goa. Back in Goa she become very close to Adam, a very friendly and funny guy from Israel, whom she has been traveling with from her first day in India. She told me that she has not closed “the chapter” and that she needs to return to Goa immediately. Now, how would you feel if your travel buddy ditches you? You just traveled around 20 hours to get where you are and now you travel partner leaves you, all by yourself in a city somewhere in south India? Most people would be pissed and angry, but not me. Actually I was not angry at all. Yes, it was a bit of a strange situation because I had a few “sandwiches” with my new buddy Jonas on his roof top in front of the military base, half asleep and slightly sick, but I quickly realized the message destiny was teaching me: Linda is just following her heart. She even told me that she will regret that decision and that it might be a very stupid thing to do, but she followed her heart, said “Fuck it!” and left. At 2AM! I don’t know where she is right now, but I am sure she did the right thing. An irreversible regret? No, we don’t need or want those anymore, because following your heart is the only thing you should do in life in order to be happy. I guess the message here is that this little story I just told you may inspire people to do the right thing and not always follow what their plans, friends and mind tells them to do. Sometimes it is much simpler than that to realize what to do. And believe me, I should have followed my heart a few more times instead of listening to my planned blue prints I followed for such a long time. Linda, if you are reading this: I hope you find what you are looking for and I am happy you left. And I mean that in a caring, not rude way. Like we talked about god and the world the other night, you followed my suggestion that your life will be much better if you replace “if only” with “next time” or “now”. I hope everything will work out for you 🙂

What now? All by myself? Nah, you guys should know me better than that. Jonas seems to be a super chilled out dude and we are leaving to Munnar tomorrow. Tea hill stations, mountains, crystal clear lakes: what else do you want more? Then we continue our way up north again to visit a few national parks, Mysore (beautiful temples), Hampi (ruin city, boulder climbing, hippies), until I eventually return to Goa to spend my last few days in India just chilling out on the beach. Again. And as you can read from this blog, no Ashram for me. Fuck meditation. I think a lot about life just by enjoying the sunset and looking at the stars for hours.

So yes, traveling is much much much more than just seeing sights and boring temples. It is the people you meet and the lessons you learn from them… and the food of course. It is still too early to draw a full conclusion of how traveling is changing me so I stop mind-spacing on that issue for now. Until next time, enjoy my new pictures, keep enjoying life wherever you are, smile as bright as the sun shines, do something good and fix that irreversible regret you have.

Love life everyone.